Publication: Boston Globe, July 17, 1989
by Desiree French, Globe Staff
BRINGING JEWISH SINGLES TOGETHER
Betsy Quint of Marblehead, 22 and recently graduated from Simmons College, is on a mission. She's a single Jewish woman looking for a single Jewish man.
Surrounded by a swarm of bubbly women friends Friday night at Citi, a Boston club, Quint is overheard asking an unmistakably blunt question. "Have you seen a guy about this high with dark hair?" she asked. "I'm looking for one." She is not alone.
Standing by herself, swaying to the beat of Top 40 rhythm-and-blues, is Beth Levy of Framingham. A computer consultant, Levy, 24, is saying something about not coming to "these Jewish events to find someone . . . but it's a good start."
The two women, along with dozens of other singles, were at Citi Friday night to take part in "Party 'Til You Plotz," sponsored by the Society of Young Jewish Professionals, a two-year-old social organization that caters to professionals aged 22 to 39.
What started as an annual Christmas eve party, a "Matzo Ball," has evolved into a big boogie and social phenomenon that attracts Jews from as far as Rhode Island and Maine.
What Jewish mothers who play shadchen, or matchmaker, cannot accomplish, the society attempts to carry out in a hip and lavish way. At such nightspots as Le Papillon, Zanzibar, Citi, the Jukebox, Roxy and Chevy's Belair Cafe in Framingham, SYJP -- with a membership of nearly 200 and a mailing list of 3,800 -- tries to help cultivate friendships, even marriage, among Boston area Jews.
"The grandmothers and mothers love us," says Andy Rudnick, 25, SYJP's founder and self-appointed Cupid. "They see our ads in the Jewish Advocate. They like that we're bringing Jews together. They think I'm a modern day Messiah."
Well, maybe. The Jewish Sabbath begins every Friday at sunset and ends at sundown on Saturday, right around the time the society begins some of its parties. And shmoozing and partying they were at Citi on Friday night.
Howard Breslau of Newton, a 25-year-old marketing director and SYJP member who has turned out for about a dozen of the society's 14 events, was there. "Religious people would normally stay in and observe the Sabbath," he says, "but the younger crowd wants to come out on a Friday and do things like this."
Bedecked in a crisp suit and tie, Breslau elaborates. "When people get out of college it's hard meeting people, especially if you're Jewish. But people here are doing that. It's different from going to a bar and playing games. We come to these things to meet young ladies and have a good time."
The numbers tell why. According to the Boston Redevelopment Authority, there were 25,000 Jews in Boston in 1985, the latest year for which numbers are available. Nearly 12,000, or 47 percent, were in the 21 to 30 age group. During the same period, there were 228,000 Jews in Greater Boston, 23 percent, or 53,000, between 21 and 30.
Recent numbers compiled by the Jewish Advocate, however, show a modest decline in the Jewish population in Boston over the last four years. About 20,000 Jews now reside here, and another 187,000 live in the metropolitan Boston area.
Declining numbers like these can create a problem for single Jews who feel strongly about religious and cultural teachings or who suffer guilt trips if they date anyone other than a Jew.
Janice Pressman, 22, tries not to let parental pressure "to find a nice Jewish guy" get to her. Yet, the Peabody resident has turned up at two SYJP parties and will likely go to others. "It's a nice way to meet people. I had fun at the Roxy function, so I decided to come back again" to Citi. "The advantage is that there are more guys than girls," she says, grinning broadly.
Rudnick says the ratio of men to women who attend his events, which include harbor cruises, comedy nights at local clubs and trips to theatrical performances, is 60-40. The average SYJP member -- who pays a $60 annual membership fee -- is 27 and works in the computer, law or medical fields as an analyst, lawyer or doctor.
Not everyone, however , is a professional. Take 25-year-old Pamela Duchin and her sisters, Stephanie and Amy. "We're three young, single Jewish sisters. We're not professionals, but what the heck, we're here to have fun," says Pamela, who works in retail clothing sales.
Stephanie Duchin, 23 and unemployed, likes the fact that SYJP parties are open to the public. "It's not a temple event," she stresses. "Judaism is very important to me, but I don't want to limit myself, and I have found that a lot of those events had the same types of people."
Nonprofit organizations like the Leventhal Sidman Jewish Community Center in Newton sponsor parties for single Jews, too. Usually held in community- center auditoriums, the parties are shunned by most SYJP partygoers. The ( glitz and allure of Boston area night spots are more appealing, as is SYJP's open-to-the-public policy.
But Ami Banezre, 27, cares less about location and more about meeting the right Jewish woman. A curly haired Israelicitizen, he was at Citi with his cousin, Mark Banezre, 33, a Boston contractor. "I'm looking all the time for something special, but I don't find the special. I love Jewish girls because I'm religious. I go all the time with Jewish girls," says Banezre, all the while turning his head so as not to miss any promising prospects.
Phyllis Lipton, a 32-year-old pulmonary technician who is just out of a three-year relationship, has simple needs. She strolled into Citi to party once again after taking a big step the week before by attending a SYJP event at Le Papillon, her first night out alone in years.
"It is scary going out to these things. You don't know what to expect. This was different," she says. So different that Phyllis, who never expected to meet anyone, met two men at Le Papillon whom she ended up dating. But she eventually dumped one because "I can't believe when we sat down to eat he said, 'Let's go dutch.' I couldn't believe it."
Rudnick, who has already made a name for himself for his "Matzo Ball" parties, hopes to spread the theme nationwide. He is negotiating to have the idea marketed in 10 cities, including Boca Raton, Fla., Chicago, Cleveland and Los Angeles.
If they respond in those cities the way Steven Forman of Cohasset reponded in Boston, Rudnick should be on a roll. "He's providing a service," says Forman, 36. "Everyone is so concerned about dating these days. Unfortunately, in today's society you come to a place like this and there's no common bond. With this, people are more inclined to approach each other. This is a good idea."
Beth Levy, who regularly attends non-Jewish events for singles, too, agrees. "It's fabulous. It makes something a little difficult more easy." When last seen at Citi, however, Levy was standing alone. Maybe things will pick up at this week's shmooze cruise.
Copyright 1989, 1998 Globe Newspaper Company
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